When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
