Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize