If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize