I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
