So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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