Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
