are you so shy because you have an std?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
