Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
