high people should be assigned attendants
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
