Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
