they need to just BURY HIM!
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
