That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
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