Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
