new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
