Where is the hickey?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
