hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
