Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
