ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
