I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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