Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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