he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
