We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I am available for nakedness
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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