The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
