addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize
