So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Pooping to opera.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
