just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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