That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
