nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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