u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
