somebody snuck up and got me drunk
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
The beer is more important than you right now.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
