I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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