3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
