first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
