Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize