the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
