so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
