I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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