i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
