while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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