He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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