So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
