well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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