My brain says no but my pants say off.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize