I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
