we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize