I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
