READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
that may or may not have been my penis.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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