So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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