Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
