I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
