do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
